Before I begin, this post is for you AK….He is one among the small group of people that WordPress lovingly calls ‘My followers’. This post is a part-II of the very first post I wrote here
For all my non-Indian followers, a small footnote: Tamilians are an ethnic majority in the southern part of India, and the main reason why Trump hates immigrants. (Because, when you are a Tamilian all you get to do is sit in the Bay area and write endless codes to save the Googles and Microsofts of the world) With this bit of info, read on….
After he sent that text, I got very curious. Then I asked him how do you know that I’m Tamil? And he told me that he was kinda one himself as his dad was from Coimbatore, and he can easily recognise Tamil faces. I was actually offended at this revelation because even I’m one among the 1.2 billion Indians who speak nationalism but wouldn’t take pride in buying anything that’s Indian. I love my language, I love my people (or rather love to fake it that way) but hate it when someone says I look like one. With that began our endless chatting. We discussed our interests and passion (Read: Just a whole bunch of lies to seem really cool). After an hour , out of the blue, he asked me ‘Do you smoke?’ I got enticed and typed YES! He was like, ‘Oh in caps and all huh?’ I told him I smoke just two everyday and try to keep it that way because nicotine addiction is crazy ( especially for girls, with crazier jobs) and I don’t want to become a living chimney. He replied saying , ‘Ewww so you thought I meant cigarettes? ‘,I replied ‘yes’ in my usual affirmative, know-it-all self. It was then that he clarified that he meant pot. Ohh,now I get the California connection,I thought.
The next thirty minutes were spent in him educating me on weed edibles, the kind you would find in Amsterdam. This guy somehow managed to smuggle them into India. He asked me out and we fixed our date the very next day. He told me that he would bring the edibles along and I was ‘only’ super excited, nothing more….(In the meanwhile I ditched the poor IIMian who I led on so much, and didn’t feel even an iota of guilt about that. Yes, I am what guys fondly refer to as ‘BITCH’ in all caps)
The next day I woke up to get ready for office. We fixed our date after office at 7 pm. I did not think much on deciding what to wear because I was more interested in the edibles than the guy.Also I got this vibe that we are gonna end up as good friends and nothing beyond. And also, I didn’t wanna look like I was trying too much. Nothing is hotter than looking effortlessly hot, I thought. I just paired my super distressed skinnies with a white tank and spent only an hour on my hair and makeup . I strapped on the highest heels that I ever owned. And then, after all these efforts, I did look effortless. I reached office and resumed my usual business of putting on earphones, switching on some music and straddling off to oblivion far from my obnoxious colleagues. The day passed and then ‘The clock struck seven , I ran down….Hickory D**kory Dock’.
He was waiting downstairs and we greeted each other with a customary handshake.Then we got in the car and began our Odyssey with Bangalore’s traffic. Yeah, if there was a contest between Odysseus and Bangaloreans as to who would reach their homes first, the former would win hands down. Any Bangalorean would vouch for this.The traffic was turning out to be nightmarish as I’m a good talker but a very poor conversation starter. Yeah, I can’t handle uncomfortable silences. But the Vincent Vega beside me couldn’t get any better. He did not roll me ‘one of those’ but definitely fed me one of those. ‘Time for the edibles lady’, he screamed and showed it to me . I freaked out. It was a tiny white pill and looked nothing close to pot. I popped one and it tasted like what could’ve if Mentos slept with pot and decided to sleep with it forever. After that, a sudden feeling of panic struck me…’this is not some date rape shit right?’ I asked him. He did not say anything, instead he gave me a creepy smile…..a very creepy smile…a very very creepy smile……
P.S: Don’t worry, I survived that night…maybe just enough to share my story!